DEBTS AND TRESPASSES


And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.
(Matthew 6: 12 – NAS)


When I was young, the church I went to used “trespasses” in the Lord’s Prayer. I did, of course, know of the other translation. It would be one of the things when traveling, when we would visit a church somewhere. Were we to be debtors or trespassers?

I would think about how we see those as two different things, very different it seemed to me. So how was it that whatever the Greek word was at this point would translate acceptably as such different things?

To my young mind, I understood the need for forgiveness of trespasses. That word (and the negative aspect of it) was fairly easy to grasp. “No trespassing” signs were a common plot device in many older cartoons, so even the very young could follow that it meant the you weren’t supposed to intrude on someone else’s territory. From there it was easy enough to extend it outward and see that any act when infringed or damaged someone else’s “territory” whether physical or psychological or spiritual was a trespass of sorts. An injury of sorts.

So it was easy enough to understand the need for forgiveness of trespasses. Especially if you committed the trespass unintentionally.

But debt was a different matter.

A debt, to my youthful mind, was something you owed someone else, usually because they had given you something. So what did it mean to ask that our debts be forgiven?

When you’re young, you think in the most basic terms. In this case, money. Suppose I owed my brother a dollar, if that debt is forgiven, I don’t have to give a dollar back to him.

On the one hand, that seemed like a very desirable thing. Especially if I no longer had a dollar to return to him. I wouldn’t have to worry about his constantly asking for a dollar I no longer had to give him. But on the other hand, it seemed kind of unfair. After all, I had gotten the benefit of the dollar. Didn’t he deserve to be repaid?

Of course, there is a condition on this. “As we forgive those who ....”

Ah, ha! So this isn’t just a blind waving away of all the things we got wrong, intentionally or otherwise.

How well do we forgive others, when they trespass against us, when they are in our debt for any reason?

It’s human nature to remember injuries done to us and debts that are owed us. When we are intruded upon, we feel the damage. When we give out of our means we know we have shortened our own supply in order to benefit someone else. We remember these things because they are significant.

But to forgive them? To set them aside? That’s not so easy.

Most all of us keep a mental ledger of injuries and debts, whether we admit it or not. Quid pro quo, this for that, is a very common factor in life.

At this point, we start to realize what a difficult process forgiveness is. Yes, certainly, we desire to have our own infractions forgiven. To know that we are relieved of the burden of knowing we have injured someone, that is a joyful feeling. But our sense of justice balks at being relieved of our debts to others. We know full well that we have benefited from something given by someone else, something they gave out of their own means. But to be forgiven our debt to that person means it’s likely they will never receive a recompense for what they gave out. That just doesn’t seem right.

The weight of indebtedness can be crippling. So much of our life has been supported by the assistance of others, in so very many ways. From the small debt to the person who made way for us in the grocery line because we were in a rush and they only had one item to the person who helps us out financially in a major emergency. The small debts we accept easily enough. The big ones we often respond to with “You don’t know what this means to me. I can never repay this!” Often when we say that last one, we are talking not about the debt of the actual money, but rather the significance of the help at that moment.

To have debts like that forgiven is to lighten our hearts, to let us accept the gift and bless the giver and move forward without being entangled in trying to balance things out on our own.

But Jesus in instructing us to pray this way is making us equally responsible for how well we extend this grace to others. “As we forgive those who have trespassed against us, as we forgive our debtors.” We are asking to receive just the type of forgiveness we give to others.

Which is where I come to a screeching halt.

So, it is not just about asking to be forgiven for my own mistakes and injuries I have done. It was easy enough to ask for that, for the Lord knows that I’ve made those mistakes and committed those injuries – many inadvertently, but some intentionally. It is about how well I can let go of requiring retribution or restitution for what has been done to me or what I have given others.

That’s not so easy.

“You hurt me.” We want our injuries to be understood and acknowledged. We want the other person to apologize, to ask for forgiveness.

But that’s not what Jesus seems to be supporting here. He doesn’t say “Forgive those who have injured you only when they ask for it.” He’s saying that basically we are to be living in such an attitude that we can forgive even as things happen to us. Pretty much the way God goes about it. In some ways, forgiving injuries can become easy. We can humbly endure the blows of the world, and forgive the striker even as the blows fall.

Forgiving debts as we go along is not as easy. If we loan someone money, on the understanding that it IS a loan, we expect a return on it. That’s reasonable, that’s fair, and when we’re the debtor, we understand that. It’s why we fall into great distress when we cannot repay such a debt. It is fair and right that our benefactor be repaid. When we are the one who has given something out, we expected a return at some point. It takes a lot of strength to let go of that expectation.

When we get beyond mere money matters and into other types of debts, we don’t often pay attention to the fact that we do regard them as debts. “I helped you with that thing, I expect you to return the favor.” That type of thinking lingers in the backs of our minds. Quid pro quo. We want to feel that we got something out of our actions.

“Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.”

Forget about asking for return favors from those you have helped. If they give back, it is grace. But not because of quid pro quo.

That is what Jesus wants us to strive for.

Forgive us as we forgive others.

I know I am in desperate need of forgiveness – we all are. However careful I am, I know it’s possible to do injury to others. There are debts of caring and support and encouragement that I can never repay fully: the givers cannot possibly know how deeply important some small gift was at the moment they gave it. I need forgiveness.

How well do I forgive others? That’s where I trip up. Am I holding on to some unvoiced expectation of recompense for something? Am I harboring the sting of a wound I received? Am I holding on to the memory of something given that went seemingly unacknowledged and never repaid?

Maybe we need to add something here: “Help me to forgive, Lord, because I’m not very good at it.”

Happily, the forgiveness of God is more far-reaching, deeper, all-encompassing than we can possibly imagine. But we still need to learn how to do it ourselves.